Entry: Exactly Monday, October 10, 2011



My writing sucks. I'm all over the place. I'm like a giant emo douchebag right now and it is pissing me off. A lot. I know what I want, I don't know how to get it and I am sitting around feeling sorry for myself. I am also being a total chick about some other things and that pisses me off as well.

Jeb has suggested that I see a shrink. Jeb can lick my ass. I'm glad it worked for him, but I refuse to see a psychologist or psychiatrist. I just can't do it. To me, if I do that I admit defeat. If I admit defeat I might as well go back to that shitty relationship I was in for 15 years. No offense to anyone that one of those doctors has helped. It works for some people, it just isn't for me.

Right now I think I will just have to switch back into angry, hard, sarcastic Zombie mode. Anti-social, hermit Zombie. I let my wall down and regret it. I let emotions show and I regret it. From here on out it is me against the world in the most literal sense.

One last thing before I quit
I never wanted any more than I could fit into my head
I still remember every single word you said
And all the shit that somehow came along with it
Still there's one thing that comforts me
Since I was always caged and now I'm free



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