I was going through my "favorites" earlier & thought I'd share a few links that I have tucked away.  You see, I have entriely too much time on my hands.  Time that could be spent doing something productive is actually spent looking for cracked out sites & naked men.

True Porn Clerk Stories
Insanity Test - this one requires the use of your speakers.  Please make sure they are properly functioning as you will need to identify sounds.
Peter Pan's Homepage - No really, you HAVE to go look.
The Periodic Table of Funk

I recently saw what could have been the best commercial of the Christmas season.  Of course the key words there are could have been.  Let me lay it out for you.

There were several Christmas elves (I have to differenciate now otherwise someone might think I mean one of those cute boy elves from those movies I've never actually seen) were decorating an area with festive items.  You had an elf hanging garland & one putting out pillows (I think that was the Surprise! By Design elf or maybe the Christopher Lowell elf). 

Then, and this is the best part, an elf jumps out of nowhere with two daggers in his hand!  YES!  He was going to off his entirely too cheery partners.  I could see what was coming in my head.  Little elves in bad felt costumes running for their lives.  All you can hear are high pitched screams & the jingle of the bells on their tiny shoes.  The only thing that would make this any better would be if he was assigned by Santa to do this, gather the bodies & return them for an elf roast.  I was giddy with excitement waiting to see how this would play out on the television.

About that time my whole Christmas elf massacre dream came crashing down around me.  The elf wasn't holding daggers, but merely over priced candle sticks in gaudy holders.  Although I seceretly hoped he would bludgeon his fellow elves to death, I knew it wasn't going to happen.  My hopes & dreams had been smashed against the rocks of life.  I was deeply saddened.

Word of the Day
disturb - di-'st&rb - verb
1.  a) to interfere with: interrupt  b) to alter the position or arrangement of  c) to upset the natural and especially the ecological balance or relations of
2.  a) to destroy the tranquillity or composure of  b) to throw into disorder  c) alarm  d) to put to inconvenience

P.S.  I just realized that my ability to spell correctly has gone on vacation.

I CAN'T SLEEP!  I can't stand when I'm like this.  I can't find anything to do.  Sure, there are plenty things I could be doing, but I am entirely too tired to do any of them.  Not to mention the fact that there is not a single interesting thing on television.  Stress sucks such ass.

I would bother to make this an interesting post, however, that would require using my brain.  Well, that's just not going to happen.  This entry is writing itself.  I have no real control over it.  So if his suddenly goes into a diatribe about mutant blue seamonkeys attempting world domination, please know that it really has nothing to do with me.  It is me, but it isn't me.  I'm too tired to care & sometimes my mind just runs rampant.  Ask anyone who has received an email from me in french concerning a monkey in a fez (because they are super cool when wearing a fez), music & world domination.

Yes, monkeys & world domination are recurring themes in my twisted little head.  So are naked men, but those thoughts aren't usually fit for public viewing.  Besides, I know (in some cases somewhat know) some of the naked men in question.  I'm sure Noodley & KTOAB wouldn't want the indiscretions that take place in my head involving them to be discussed in a public type forum.  OK, so Noodley & KTOAB aren't really involved in the indiscretions, I just thought it would be amusing to make them sick to their stomachs for a nanosecond.

Today I had a school flashback.  I wrote a paper on censorship.  Well, not a whole paper technically.  I laid out the basis for my Mom.  She's gotten behind in her english work with everything that's been going on.  So, I figured the least I could do was help.  Its about all I can do being so far away.  It makes me sad. *sniff*

Ooohh, I also made brownies today.  Not something I need to be eating, but I swear the brownie box was calling me from the cabinet.  I kept hearing this little voice.  When I opened the cabinet door, it became louder.  So I really had no choice.  The brownie mix was beggin' for it.

This weeks Crush really needs no introduction.  But, in case you are unaware of who this its, its none other than one of the most beautiful men walking the face of the earth.  Otherwise known as David Bowie.  I don't care if he is 90, I'd still shag him rotten.  This is one of those obsession that started in early childhood.  That's all I can tell you about its origin.  I can also tell you that it disturbed my parents greatly.  I think it still does. 

I'm working on getting a photoblog dealie together.  So until something really pisses me off & I'm sure it will, there will be no other post this evening.  Besides I'm really in a mood & lookin' for someone to call a knob.

I would just like you all to know that I am currently being mocked & ridiculed for my ability to dance in my chair, carry on a conversation & type.  Damn jealous people.

OK, I am blatantly going to steal the different list ideas from various people including KTOAB (with is Top 5 & Pond Sucking 5) & Noodley (with his Top Two lists).  Since I am terminally indecisive, maybe I'll just make a list of things I love, like & detest.  What will be on these lists I have no clue.  I'm winging it people.

Nevermind.  After sitting here staring at a blank screen for 5 minutes, I can't think of anything to put short of completely ripping off Noodley's Top Two lists.  So screw it.

Miss Ginger had a nice post today pertaining to the 70's.  Now mind you, I was born in the first half of the 70's so I have to check & see if things I remember from my childhood are actually from the 70's or the early 80's.  I remember the mid - late 80's as it was a hellish time for me.  I wish I could forget it.

This made me start to think about things from my youth.  Television shows I remember, music, toys, things like that.  Let's see what I can actually remember.

The Gold Key Hour on Channel 11 in the DFW area.  Every afternoon my ass was parked in front of the TV so that I could watch whichever Krofft show they happened to put on that day.  My favorite, to this very day, is Sigmund and the Sea Monsters.  My second favorite was Far Out Space Nuts.  I never really cared much for the Bugaloos.  They were always singing really crap stuff.  H.R. Pufnstuf was cool for about 30 seconds in my book.  I also really like Land of the Lost, but that was only on Saturday mornings.  Well, Far Out Space Nuts was the same I think.  Hell, I don't remember.  That was a long time ago.  I've slept & been dropped on my head since then.

CHiPs was a television show I could not live without.  Why my parents actually let me watch it I don't know.  I was completely in love with John (Larry Wilcox).  Later, when I worked for Susan Powter (you know, the "Stop the insanity!" bleach blond buzzed chick) I got to speak to him on the phone when I was working out details for a business deal.  He was a very nice man & I restrained myself & never said one word about CHiPs.

In case anyone happens to run across this poster anywhere, preferably an original, let me know.  I want one terribly.