There are days like today when I wonder if all of this shit is really worth it. I mean, think about it, in the end what do you really have? Nothing. If you are lucky there are a few people hanging around because they think you are a decent human being. The rest think you are a douche no matter what you do for them.
I've spent the last year working on myself. Trying to open up a little. Trying to be more friendly, more sociable. I've lost a shit ton of weight. I've gotten rid of a terribly bad relationship. All it has gotten me is kicked in my non-existent balls. The only good thing to come out of all of this is my friendship with Jeb. Maybe that is all I am suppose to get from it. I don't know.
I'm tired of the backstabbing and the teenage bullshit. We are fucking adults. Why do people have to act like that? I just don't fucking get it.
Oh, yeah, I soooo should have slept with the Canadian from the other night. Just on principle.