OK first off, I don't like football.  The closest I come to knowing anything about football is knowing the spreads for the college games so I can bet my parlay card every week.  Lately I've been having this damn dream.  It involves myself, my mom, my nephews (all 4 of them) & these two damn football players.

These two guys, whoever the hell they are, are walking around my mom's house like they own the place.  Mom is of course doting over them.  That's not unusal, she dotes over all house guests.  One of the guys is walking around in an apron & helping mom in the kitchen.  The other is watching television with me.  We are sitting on the couch, the two youngest boys climbing the guy like he's an amusement ride.  I get the overwhelming feeling that I want to treat him like some kind of pornographic fair attraction.

There is some chit chat, nothing major.  My sister screaming at the boys.  Mom saying how she was glad they made it.  blah, blah, blah  They boys were wearing midget jerseys they brought them as gifts.  The main color, purple.  So, I went to [NFL.com] to try & figure out who in the hell had purple jerseys.

You see, I can't just chalk it up to some freak thing.  This is the 3rd time I've had this damn dream.  You'd think I would remember more than I do.  But NO!  So, I've spent the last hour & a half looking at team rosters for the Ravens, Vikings & Chargers.  In that order.  My knowledge of football & its players is so limited that I couldn't even write a full page, double-spaced about it.  Anyway, after looking through EVERY last picture, I came to one that twisted my poor little stomach.

This [guy], I don't even find attractive.  Let's make a little check list.

Dark hair - this guy has no hair
Light eyes - ummm no
Over 6' - Nope

See, he's ALL wrong.  Not just a little, but completely wrong.  What the hell is up with this?  I don't recall ever having seen this guy.  Not once in my entire friggin life.  I've never really put much stock into dream interpretation.  I'm a little off my rocker anyway.  But I could at least be dreaming about hot Russian hockey players.  That I could understand.